1. 2911 thumb
    depressed_to_death
    Gender: M
    Data Quality: 3 stars
    Depression: 4
    Mania: 2
    Emotional: 2
    Anxiety: 3
    Compulsion: 3
    External Stress: Severe
    38 M
    Function: Low
    Distress: High
    I am: b
    I have:
    Major Depressive Disorder

    depressed_to_death completed the Mood Map survey

    • Function
    • Distress
    • External Stress
    • Depression
    • Emotional
    • Compulsion
    • Anxiety
    • Mania

    better? .. really? .. beats me!

  2. 2911 thumb
    depressed_to_death
    Gender: M
    Data Quality: 3 stars
    Depression: 4
    Mania: 2
    Emotional: 2
    Anxiety: 3
    Compulsion: 3
    External Stress: Severe
    38 M
    Function: Low
    Distress: High
    I am: b
    I have:
    Major Depressive Disorder

    planning the trip to see the cardio and have tests .. the hospital is in another country .. (i.e. Dubai) .. so airlines, hotel reservations .. it's just crazy .. and no one to help me with it .. I'm old enough to do it myself and all .. but moral support would be nice ..

  3. 2911 thumb
    depressed_to_death
    Gender: M
    Data Quality: 3 stars
    Depression: 4
    Mania: 2
    Emotional: 2
    Anxiety: 3
    Compulsion: 3
    External Stress: Severe
    38 M
    Function: Low
    Distress: High
    I am: b
    I have:
    Major Depressive Disorder

    didn't sleep a wink, last night .. just thinking about stuff ..

    2 comments from other members. Only showing public users' comments. Sign up to see all comments!
      2911 thumb
      depressed_to_death 2 days ago

      I have a very good friend whom I talk to .. but she's not a psychologist/psychiatrist .. having her listen helps, a lot .. otherwise, no .. I don't see a professional ..

  4. 2911 thumb
    depressed_to_death
    Gender: M
    Data Quality: 3 stars
    Depression: 4
    Mania: 2
    Emotional: 2
    Anxiety: 3
    Compulsion: 3
    External Stress: Severe
    38 M
    Function: Low
    Distress: High
    I am: b
    I have:
    Major Depressive Disorder

    have any of you heard about dignitas? .. do you think it's right/wrong? .. not for a terminally ill patient, but someone who is very depressed and going to do it anyway .. ?

    2 comments from other members. Only showing public users' comments. Sign up to see all comments!
  5. 2911 thumb
    depressed_to_death
    Gender: M
    Data Quality: 3 stars
    Depression: 4
    Mania: 2
    Emotional: 2
    Anxiety: 3
    Compulsion: 3
    External Stress: Severe
    38 M
    Function: Low
    Distress: High
    I am: b
    I have:
    Major Depressive Disorder

    go away!

  6. 2911 thumb
    depressed_to_death
    Gender: M
    Data Quality: 3 stars
    Depression: 4
    Mania: 2
    Emotional: 2
    Anxiety: 3
    Compulsion: 3
    External Stress: Severe
    38 M
    Function: Low
    Distress: High
    I am: b
    I have:
    Major Depressive Disorder

    the family, instead of helping, made it a lot worse by calling me things like an "addict", "stupid" ... "crazy" .. and used me .. I am very angry at them, for that ..

  7. 2911 thumb
    depressed_to_death
    Gender: M
    Data Quality: 3 stars
    Depression: 4
    Mania: 2
    Emotional: 2
    Anxiety: 3
    Compulsion: 3
    External Stress: Severe
    38 M
    Function: Low
    Distress: High
    I am: b
    I have:
    Major Depressive Disorder

    a friend came over and we went out grocery shopping, so that was really the highlight of the week ..

    afterwards we went to a cafe and coffee .. and I was telling him how I can't feel job .. I can't enjoy anything and how frustrating that is ..

  8. 2911 thumb
    depressed_to_death
    Gender: M
    Data Quality: 3 stars
    Depression: 4
    Mania: 2
    Emotional: 2
    Anxiety: 3
    Compulsion: 3
    External Stress: Severe
    38 M
    Function: Low
    Distress: High
    I am: b
    I have:
    Major Depressive Disorder

    depressed_to_death became a 3 star data donor! star earnedstar earnedstar earned

    if my life is a waste .. I hope someone out there can benefit from the data ..

    17 comments from other members. Only showing public users' comments. Sign up to see all comments!
      2911 thumb
      depressed_to_death 4 days ago

      I am very sorry jamesjors, to hear that ..

      2911 thumb
      depressed_to_death 4 days ago

      thank you, James .. that is most kind of you .. I used to have a pretty good life .. work, success, friends, etc .. I lost my mother (who was also my best friend) five and a half years ago .. and it's all been downhill from there .. the family, instead of being supportive and understanding, make it worst with a lot of emotional abuse .. A LOT of emotional abuse so as to break me and self-esteem down and I become their "gopher" ..

      2911 thumb
      depressed_to_death 2 days ago

      thank you, james .. that means a lot to me .. I'll send you my email address in a private message ..

      2911 thumb
      depressed_to_death 1 day ago

      omg.. that's crazy ..

      2911 thumb
      depressed_to_death about 6 hours ago

      so did the doctor help?

  9. 2911 thumb
    depressed_to_death
    Gender: M
    Data Quality: 3 stars
    Depression: 4
    Mania: 2
    Emotional: 2
    Anxiety: 3
    Compulsion: 3
    External Stress: Severe
    38 M
    Function: Low
    Distress: High
    I am: b
    I have:
    Major Depressive Disorder

    depressed_to_death updated his symptoms

    BetterSocial anxiety, Painful lymph nodes (glands), Mood swings, Inattention, Difficulty sleeping through night
    WorseUnrefreshing or poor sleep, Uncontrollable crying, Tremor in hands, Sweating, Stomach pain See more
  10. 2911 thumb
    depressed_to_death
    Gender: M
    Data Quality: 3 stars
    Depression: 4
    Mania: 2
    Emotional: 2
    Anxiety: 3
    Compulsion: 3
    External Stress: Severe
    38 M
    Function: Low
    Distress: High
    I am: b
    I have:
    Major Depressive Disorder

    depressed_to_death updated his weight

  11. 2911 thumb
    depressed_to_death
    Gender: M
    Data Quality: 3 stars
    Depression: 4
    Mania: 2
    Emotional: 2
    Anxiety: 3
    Compulsion: 3
    External Stress: Severe
    38 M
    Function: Low
    Distress: High
    I am: b
    I have:
    Major Depressive Disorder
  12. 2911 thumb
    depressed_to_death
    Gender: M
    Data Quality: 3 stars
    Depression: 4
    Mania: 2
    Emotional: 2
    Anxiety: 3
    Compulsion: 3
    External Stress: Severe
    38 M
    Function: Low
    Distress: High
    I am: b
    I have:
    Major Depressive Disorder

    depressed_to_death updated the condition ADHD (Attention Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder)

    • First symptom:
    • Diagnosis: ?
  13. 2911 thumb
    depressed_to_death
    Gender: M
    Data Quality: 3 stars
    Depression: 4
    Mania: 2
    Emotional: 2
    Anxiety: 3
    Compulsion: 3
    External Stress: Severe
    38 M
    Function: Low
    Distress: High
    I am: b
    I have:
    Major Depressive Disorder

    just numb ..

    I know the family will never be able to understand this ..

    I'm waiting for a miracle/savior .. but I have a feeling that isn't happening ..

    I want the pain to end ..

    11 comments from other members. Only showing public users' comments. Sign up to see all comments!
  14. 2911 thumb
    depressed_to_death
    Gender: M
    Data Quality: 3 stars
    Depression: 4
    Mania: 2
    Emotional: 2
    Anxiety: 3
    Compulsion: 3
    External Stress: Severe
    38 M
    Function: Low
    Distress: High
    I am: b
    I have:
    Major Depressive Disorder

    one of those days where whatever can go wrong, does go wrong ..

    but, for some reason .. I don't care ..

    1 comment from other members. Only showing public users' comments. Sign up to see all comments!
    • 2911 thumb
      depressed_to_death
      Gender: M
      Data Quality: 3 stars
      Depression: 4
      Mania: 2
      Emotional: 2
      Anxiety: 3
      Compulsion: 3
      External Stress: Severe
      38 M
      Function: Low
      Distress: High
      I am: b
      I have:
      Major Depressive Disorder

      I feel invisible .. like no one can see me .. or hear my cries for help ..

      3 comments from other members. Only showing public users' comments. Sign up to see all comments!
    • 2911 thumb
      depressed_to_death
      Gender: M
      Data Quality: 3 stars
      Depression: 4
      Mania: 2
      Emotional: 2
      Anxiety: 3
      Compulsion: 3
      External Stress: Severe
      38 M
      Function: Low
      Distress: High
      I am: b
      I have:
      Major Depressive Disorder

      depressed_to_death was feeling bad for

      sis announced they're coming over some holidays in December or January .. I live in mom's house .. so she wants to visit ..

      well, isn't going to be barell of laugh

      he won't stay here .. he'll live and she will be here .. tons of arguiing and fights and it always end up being Bilal's fault ..

      3 comments from other members. Only showing public users' comments. Sign up to see all comments!
        2911 thumb
        depressed_to_death 9 days ago

        yes .. I will have to make an agreement with them .. and let them know if it's violated, I'm going to move out for the time they're here .. excellent idea, Dover .. thanks so much

    • 2911 thumb
      depressed_to_death
      Gender: M
      Data Quality: 3 stars
      Depression: 4
      Mania: 2
      Emotional: 2
      Anxiety: 3
      Compulsion: 3
      External Stress: Severe
      38 M
      Function: Low
      Distress: High
      I am: b
      I have:
      Major Depressive Disorder

      depressed_to_death was feeling bad for

      it's 5:00 a.m., haven't been able to sleep so been on the laptop ..

      I hate mornings .. the birds chirping and all that crap ..

    • 2911 thumb
      depressed_to_death
      Gender: M
      Data Quality: 3 stars
      Depression: 4
      Mania: 2
      Emotional: 2
      Anxiety: 3
      Compulsion: 3
      External Stress: Severe
      38 M
      Function: Low
      Distress: High
      I am: b
      I have:
      Major Depressive Disorder

      depressed_to_death was feeling bad for

      just feel crummy .. spoke to my sister .. but really miss my mother .. she has the solution to every problem .. and wasn't afraid or apologetic for being herself ..

      3 comments from other members. Only showing public users' comments. Sign up to see all comments!
        2911 thumb
        depressed_to_death 12 days ago

        my mom passed away 5 years ago .. and that's what's made the depression and my general emotional/physical being a lot worst .. we were very very close .. dad died when I was 14, so I didn't really know him ..

    • 2911 thumb
      depressed_to_death
      Gender: M
      Data Quality: 3 stars
      Depression: 4
      Mania: 2
      Emotional: 2
      Anxiety: 3
      Compulsion: 3
      External Stress: Severe
      38 M
      Function: Low
      Distress: High
      I am: b
      I have:
      Major Depressive Disorder

      I recently moved to another country .. to get away from the family .. I had my stuff shipped .. most of it has been damaged .. and A LOT of my personal things have been stolen .. emoticon sad .. and I can't do anything about it .. this is so unfair ..

      2 comments from other members. Only showing public users' comments. Sign up to see all comments!
        2911 thumb
        depressed_to_death about 2 weeks ago

        I don't care about material things .. but I had my mother's last bag, a LV bucket, which I cherished soo much .. and it's gone .. emoticon sad

    • 2911 thumb
      depressed_to_death
      Gender: M
      Data Quality: 3 stars
      Depression: 4
      Mania: 2
      Emotional: 2
      Anxiety: 3
      Compulsion: 3
      External Stress: Severe
      38 M
      Function: Low
      Distress: High
      I am: b
      I have:
      Major Depressive Disorder

      depressed_to_death was feeling bad for

      so with those whole quest for a new life (and all that jazz) .. things aren't exactly going according to the plan ..

      my sister's (my only sibling) failed me a hundred times .. which is fine .. but I wish people wouldn't make promises they can't keep .. emoticon sad

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