I have often had suicidal thoughts but they have grown to a proportion that is scaring me this past year. I am friendly and accepting but also very shy and afraid of people. People usually think I am fine when I am not. I have a Master's Degree in filmmaking but am only able to do a few video jobs right now since the depression part of my condition has caused me to feel frozen and unable to move most of the time. Most people do like me and I need more contact in general.