PatientsLikeMe ™

I have been testing negative for years and on 7/05 I tested preliminary positive with the swab test. They drew blood today 7/7 and I am awaiting the final results. They went ahead and screened for some other std's as well. Its strange, you would think that I would feel like my whole life just fell apart, but I dont....not sure what I feel right now. My partner of 6 years is supportive as always. On 7/20 the blood results came in and I am HIV+.  As of 5-21-09 I had to break up with my partner just based on the way that he treats me, and also the underhanded things that go on....I'm sure that you've been there and know what I mean.

We split up by my choosing a week ago now....5/15/09

Curiosity

may have killed the cat; more likely
the cat was just unlucky, or else curious
to see what death was like, having no cause
to go on licking paws, or fathering
litter on litter of kittens, predictably.

Nevertheless, to be curious
is dangerous enough. To distrust
what is always said, what seems
to ask odd questions, interfere in dreams,
leave home, smell rats, have hunches
do not endear cats to those doggy circles
where well-smelt baskets, suitable wives, good lunches
are the order of things, and where prevails
much wagging of incurious heads and tails.

Face it. Curiosity
will not cause us to die--
only lack of it will.
Never to want to see
the other side of the hill
or that improbable country
where living is an idyll
(although a probable hell)
would kill us all.

Only the curious have, if they live, a tale
worth telling at all.

Dogs say cats love too much, are irresponsible,
are changeable, marry too many wives,
desert their children, chill all dinner tables
with tales of their nine lives.
Well, they are lucky. Let them be
nine-lived and contradictory,
curious enough to change, prepared to pay
the cat price, which is to die
and die again and again,
each time with no less pain.
A cat minority of one
is all that can be counted on
to tell the truth. And what cats have to tell
on each return from hell
is this: that dying is what the living do,
that dying is what the loving do,
and that dead dogs are those who do not know
that dying is what, to live, each has to do.

This is one of my latest posts….and it explains a lot about me.