I live every day like it may be my last no matter what. I do not live my MS, MS is not who I am it is a part of me that is it. I will never give up or give in unless or until otherwise I have no choice.

My whole world changed in April of 1996 after being treated for inner ear infection for two weeks I was so dizzy I was walking like I had, had to much to drink and my eyes were jumping like slot machines as the Neurologist said to me I was diagnosed with secondary progressive Multiple Sclerosis at the age of 26. I can tell you I have probably had it since I was a teenager with early on symptoms there was no explanation for. My youngest sister was diagnosed with Multiple Sclerosis less than a year after me. We joke about our being diagnosed as "leave it to us to be the first in the family history to be diagnosed with MS" as far as we know there has been no others in our family to be diagnosed with MS there would probably be no acurate records as MS back in the day was treated as a mental disorder from what I have read.

I made the decision a year after I was diagnosed to leave work for good as I had a four year old child at home and I was going to work everyday with an IV in my arm I was so sick those first two years after being diagnosed. I have tried many of the ABC drugs (injectables) to help manage the symptoms of Multiple Sclerosis (Avonex, Copaxone, Betaseron) Most of them did not work for me as I had many diffrent reactions from the injectables. up until a few years ago my Multiple Sclerosis was not in remission by any means of the word. I was having exsasurbations every six months and having to do 7 day treatments of IV steroids and prednisone tappers to get my disease to slow down the progression and making sure my exsasurbations were jumped over as quick as possiable without to much permanent damage. I have tried amny alternatives and natural treatments not so much to treat the MS but to help treat the symptoms and manage my pain.

Well today it has been 4 1/2 years since I had my last exsasurbation and steroid treatments. I owe every bit of this to my chosen treatment foe my MS which is Betaseron. Maybe I should say my body chose it as I am lucky to have the proof I need by MRI's to show that Betaseron has slowed, stopped or in some cases healed the damage done to my nerves and brain. I am a stay at home mom of a 17 year old son who does not need mom as much. I also run an internet business from my home computer to keep myself buisy. I still have my bad days with my vision (boughts of optical nueritis), extreem amounts of pain as somedays I feel as if every nerve is sounding off in my body which in someways I should only feel so lucky as their are many MS patiemts who only wish they could feel even pain as aome can feel nothing. I have lost most of the feeling on the left side of my body and have not felt it since I was first diagnosed, I have tremors on days, problems with my short term memory and am lucky if I can remember what has been said to me only five minutes ago and have walked away from ATM machines on many occassions with the money I pulled out of my account still in the tray not remembering I left it until it's to late and the money has gone into someonelses pockets. After doing that to many times I have learned that I have to slow done and make sure I go through all of the steps so I walk away with the money in my pocket. I have problems with spacticity, stiffness and pain from the waiste down and in my legs most of the time walking but I don't complain EVER!!

I can still walk and that is a blessing that some do not have the ability to do anymore. I count my blessings each and everyday as things could always be so much more worse. I have seen the worst in others lives and have lost many family members and friends to MS and other diseases. I consider myself to be lucky and blessed I don't have it in me to roll over and give up and never will I live each day as if it could be my last who knows it could be!